Ad Astra Per Aspera

roar of the greasepaint, smell of the crowd

2009-08-13T07:34:00.000-07:00

The Time Warp is upon me, and I don't mean "...a step to the right."

Flashback to 1978 (use the 'shrooms, it'll help). I begin my fledgling stage career as a chorus member in a high school production of "Once Upon a Mattress." Fun, but not really what I had in mind as an actor - where are the accolades?

1979 - senior year: I work as the understudy to the devil in "Damn Yankees." Got one time on stage when he had the flu. Ah, that's more like it...applause, yes, thank you, thank you.

1982 - back to the chorus in "Cinderella." What - no handsome prince?

1983 - Yes!! I am cast as the bad guy, the ne'r-do-well, the evil Harry Beaton in "Briggadoon." And I die in the second act! Spewing stage blood from my mouth, I am carried to the stage and laid out for the village to see. Delicious! Give me more!

Sadly, that theater went under and I became an out of work actor. Until...

1992 - Yes! I've still got it! Cast once again as a villianous character, the Russian constable in "Fiddler on the Roof." I get to smoke a pipe, carry burning torches, and kick the Jews out of Anatevka! I audition for more roles, but time, family, and not wanting to travel 30 miles both ways just for a chorus position keep me off stage. Until...

2009 - At the urging of my family and friends, I audition for a play I have never heard of and no nothing about. "It will be good for you" they say. "You need some creative outlet" I'm told. "Get the hell out of the house and go already" the Wife says.

I spend a few weeks reading the script a home - "The Foreigner" by Larry Shue. Funny stuff - part British farce, part comedy of errors. Small cast, several juicy roles for men. I settle on trying out for one of the leads, Froggy, a British military demolitions expert. After watching "My Fair Lady" several times, I head out, confident in my lines and my accent (The rine in Spine fawls minely awn the pline).

2 hours of cold readings from the script. Working with people I don't know. Read this. Go here. Thank you, next. Woof - and you thought teachers got butterflies on the first day of school!

Then, last night, the phone rings. "We were really impressed with your stage energy and your ability to hold a cockney accent for so long. We'd like to offer you the role, if you're interested."

No, I'm not interested - the whoopin' and hollerin' you hear is just my way of saying no. Of F'ing course I'm interested!

So now, instead of reading the latest James Bond novel or hitting the theaters for the debacle that is G.I. Joe, I've got my nose to a scriptbook, sitting on the lawn, sipping lemonade. Rehearsals start in two weeks - just about the time I've got to go back to school and remember how to teach English. And I couldn't be happier.

milestones

2009-08-10T08:34:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Anthony. Today you turn 18 and become an adult in the eyes of the world. Your mom and I are very proud of you and all you have done so far, and we have great hopes for you in the future. I still remember holding you in my arms the day you were born, screaming for all you were worth, making your presence known. My hands trembled a little as I cut the umbilical cord and spoke your name for the first time. We discussed your name for a long time - we wanted something strong, but did not want to name you after anyone in the family, lest we get besieged from either side. So, we took your name from a book I had read, the character being the sworn protector of the future king of an empire. Fitting, since you spend much of your time watching your younger brothers!

As you grew and matured, your personality began to show...impulsive, excitable, intelligent, and very VERY funny. It was only natural that in your final years of high school that you joined the theater and improv groups, and became one of their stars. I can only hope you continue sharing your gifts with others.

We are equally proud of you becoming an Eagle Scout. In a world where many young people turn to drugs, violence, and apathy, you have become a leader of others, sharing your knowledge of what is right/wrong with younger boys, becoming an example of how to do the right thing.

Yes, we have our differences - all people do. You and I butt heads more times than I would like. But know that we are always here for you and will support you as best we can.

Congratulations son. We love you.

happy shiny neighbors

2009-08-05T09:13:00.000-07:00

Every neighborhood has its pros and cons. Good location, friendly neighbors, nearby gang activity, overabundance of a particular ethnic group, chickens running free next door. I tend to think that my NB is pretty nice. The people are pleasant, the yards look nice - typical suburbia. I don't mind much of the crap that goes on, as long as it doesn't affect me too much.

However - when I know kids are in the 'hood, and little ones at that, I expect my neighbors to comport themselves accordingly: don't drive like Andretti, don't swear like a sailor on leave in public, keep broken bottles/trash out of the yards...the easy stuff.

So imagine my surprise to see a sign in a yard that said, in BIG BLACK MARKER:

"Don't Shit in My Yard"

Yeah - I know, dog owners can be stupid. And this guy probably has had his share of poo bombs left on the porch. However - his front yard slopes. Steep. It's covered in iceplant. And it's about 3 feet deep. Not so much a yard as a landing strip, and most dogs I see pass it by.

Now, the sign itself would not matter too much (free speech and all). However - my kids play across the street. Lots of kids play near that house. And Wife was livid. So, being the Dutiful Dad, I sauntered up to the door to ask politely if the sign could be removed. Hmmmm - now I know how the sign got such a potty mouth.

So, last night, Kid #1 and Wife made a commando raid to the house to remove the sign in the dead of night. It went out with the trash today. And our daily dog walks will be passing that house regularly to make sure no further vulgarity threatens our children.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to our family TV hour - it's time for True Blood.

End of Days

2009-07-31T09:45:00.000-07:00

Wow - in exactly 10 days, Kid #1 turns into Adult #1. Lean, mean, and 18. Look, I know I'm old - all the signs are there: grey hear in the beard, telling them to "turn down that damn music," warning the neighborhood to get off my lawn, and spending more time on the throne than I thought humanly possible.

It is interesting to watch some of his mannerisms. I think he's been watching me and picking up odd habits, ones that I wish I had kicked years ago so I'd be a better role model. But lately it's like looking into a magic mirror, seeing myself in him. Not just the looks, 'cuz our senior pictures look uncannily alike. Some of the things he says make me think there's an echo in the house. His handwriting is suspiciously familiar, and now I'm finally understanding how he was able to ditch so many classes w/o penalty.

A few years ago, I wouldn't have worried about him becoming an adult in this crazy world. Finances were OK, people weren't killing each other as much, and trust was a common commodity. Now - well, I hope to God that we've taught him how to be a good person, how to watch his back, and giving your word still means something.

Tonight, he gets the final signatures on his application to become an Eagle Scout. In a few weeks, off to college (local, but still a big step). Soon, $$ permitting, he'll get his own transportation. We're trying to play up the affordability of a scooter (thanks Kel), but it's hard to snog the girlfriend when you're sitting single file.

The world still holds many opportunities - I just hope he realizes how lucky he is.

My Music: two

2009-07-29T09:42:00.000-07:00

The past year has allowed me to find even more tribute/cover albums for my collection, several of which are really off the beaten path. Case in point: David Lee Roth's "Strummin' With the Devil." If you like THE ORIGINAL Van Halen, and you're a big bluegrass fan, then you're in luck. Picture if you will, 15 Roth-era tunes, rewritten for guitar, banjo, slide guitar, fiddle, zither, and any other down-home country instrument you can think of. Add Roth singing lead on two of them, and you've got an album that will have your toes tapping from the first song.

Roth takes lead on "Jump," which retains its fast pace, and "Jamie's Cryin," which slows down with a smooth tempo. The rest of the songs are covered by various bluegrass and southern country groups. David Grissman and Sons do a smokin' instrumental of "Hot for Teacher." Blue Highway gifts us with a soulful rendition of "I'll Wait." The pickin on "Panama" by Cornbread Red is amazing, and you can hear the grinnin in their singing. Iron Horse's version of "Unchained" is a 'hoot' and fun to sing to. All that aside, the highlight of the album is a banjo (yes, I said banjo!) version of Eddie's "Eruption." Holy Spit. I can't see Dennis Caplinger's fingers...but I doubt I'd be able to see them even if he were standing right in front of me.

This is a great album to bring to a party of friends, just to show them you have a 'fun' side when it comes to rock and roll. Put it on, sit on the porch with some southern sweet tea and a long piece of wildgrass in your mouth, and rock your blues away.

back from the grave

2009-07-28T21:07:00.000-07:00

Yeah, it's been that kind of year.

But - things are looking up for sure, you betcha. For instance...5 randon good things this week:

1) San Diego Comic Con 2009. Four days of fun, frolic, and fetching females in scanty clothing.

2) The yard work is done for the week. Huzzah!

3) Kid 1 and Kid 2 enjoying their FREE CONCERT tonight - seeing The Frey and Jack's Mannequin at Cricket Amphetheatre.

4) New job at a great school for the 09/10 season

5) I discover that a female friend (and former co-worker) frequently came to work sans underwear.

Yeah - things are looking up already.

awesome concerts

2008-11-24T08:59:00.000-08:00

See - all it takes is some uplifting classical music to bring the spirits up. "My" choir just had their first concert of the holiday season, and it was truly something special. Our program of motets, progressing through the centuries, was well attended and well sung.

The opening piece, "Spem in Alium," written about 1567, was sung by eight small groups of 10 members each, with the groups surrounding the hall and the concert-goers, putting the listener inside the sound.

Next, "Laetatus Sum," by Monteverdi (1640), swapped the small choirs for 8 soloists and full choir, along with strings and harpsichord. The soloists were at the front of the hall, while the choir entered quietly into the back. As we do not sing until measure 180 or so, the effect was amazing - most of the audience didn't even know we had entered the hall until our first "Gloria!" hit the rafters.

We followed that with "Singet dem Herrn"(1722) (Sing to the Lord), by Bach. A unique double-choir piece, with counterpoints, call and response sections, and a fast fugue.

After a short pause for the cause, we returned to the stage for the second half of the presentation with "Warum ist das Licht gegeben dem Mühseligen?" by Brahms, 1877 (Wherefore is light given to him that is in misery). A beautiful a capella piece for the full choir, this pleading motet really lifted the program to its fullest of the night.

We finished with two motets from the 20th century - first, "For lo, I raise Up," by Charles Stanford, opens with some serious anger issues from the composer, but finally shows the compassion of the Lord by the end of the piece. Finally, an unusual piece, "Motetum Archangeli Michaelis" by Swedish composer Bengt Hambraeus, showcases the church organ, with the lyrics almost secondary to the music.

We were lucky to perform these twice in the past weekend. If you live in San Diego, I urge you to check out our website, www.lajollasymphony.com, for our upcoming performances. Next up:

our very popular Messiah Sing-Along. Even if you've never sung before, you can make music with us. We seed the audience with the entire choir and sing the Christmas portion of the Messiah with you! This community performance takes place December 14th, at 4:00 p.m. at St. Elizabeth Seaton Catholic Church in Carlsbad. Call 858-534-4637 for ticket information and reservations. We'll even rent you a score for the evening.

The end of the month...

2008-11-22T14:54:00.000-08:00

...is closer than you think.

I think I've been subscribing to the "If I have checks in the checkbook then I have money in the account" mantra for way too long.
It's not that I'm extravagant. Heavens, no. But with a family of six (eight if you count the pets) and only one full-time income, something has got to change. This fershtunken economy has really put us in a pickle and I'm now wondering what will happen in the new year. It's almost enough to figure out a way to get the life insurance payoff now instead of waiting until I'm 99 or so.
(don't worry - it's not a cry for help. just the ramblings of a concerned parent)

Oh well - you don't come here to hear me wallow in self-pity. Better blog next time. promise.

Costumes -

2008-10-30T18:18:00.000-07:00

...why when I was your age I put on some old jeans, a flannel shirt, put freckles on my face and went as a HICK. We didn't go out to some Hall-o-weener superstore and pay 39.99 for a crappy piece of black crepe with a little red color thrown in for good measure! If you want a costume you can get your butt into our closet and look for goofy clothes from years gone by. Can't find it there? Then check garage for the Halloween containers - I know that last year's costumes are still in there, and they're still good. So what if you've been a Jedi for the last 5 years...no one cares!
You want a really good costume? Strip down to your tightie-whities, put a red blanket around your neck and go as Captain Underpants. Funny and cheap. Besides, you're 17 now. That's a bit too old to go around begging for candy. Shouldn't you be snogging some senior chick at a Halloween party tomorrow night?

Tastes in Music: One

2008-10-15T15:22:00.000-07:00

I have a pretty eclectic taste in music. Aside from modern Country and Western and hardcore gangsta rap, I'll listen to just about anything. However, after perusing my ginormous CD collection this weekend, I have come to the conclusion that I do have one musical genre that has permeated my being - tribute albums and cover bands/singers. While the original is always enjoyable to listen to and sing along with, there's something about having a new interpretation of an old favorite that makes me dash off to Itunes to see if it's available yet. I hope to bring you some of my favorites in the weeks to come. This week, a cover singer that is older than dirt, but brings something new to the table.

Album title: Paul Anka Rock Swings
A collection of classic rock, pop, and alternative music as interpreted by the one and only Paul Anka.

Sounds odd, doesn't it? It thought so, too, until I heard an excerpt from his version of Bon Jovi's "It's My Life." It starts out with a big band number and segues into the opening lyrics as smooth as silk. That one song made me buy the album, and I wasn't disappointed at all. This gem of an album contains 14 tunes, from pop to classic rock, with some suave alternative thrown in for good measure.

The slower songs lend to Paul's vocal style quite nicely: "True" by Spandau Ballet, "Everybody Hurts" by REM, and "Eyes Without a Face" by Billy Idol showcase his amazing range. His campy version of "Lovecats" by The Cure is playful, yet cheesy, as is his rendition of Van Halen's "Jump."
But when he moves to the alternative side of things, it's as if he's not quite sure what to do with the lyrics. "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana is a bit of a challenge to get through. And then there's "Black Hole Sun" by Soundgarden. Hearing Anka sing "...boiling heat, summer stench..." is just creepy.

Finally, if Bon Jovi's song is the top hit, then the number two pick would have to be "Wonderwall" by Oasis. Another big band version of a modern rock tune that will have you singing along in no time.

All in all, a fun album to sing along to, especially in the car. Might even give you some new ideas for karaoke night at the Lamplighter.

Major Geek Alert

2008-10-11T12:59:00.000-07:00

Thank god the offspring's karate lessons were over by 8pm last night so we could be home in time for the latest episode of Star Wars: Clone Wars! Yes, damn it, I'm a Star Wars geek and proud of it!

Back in 1977, I was that idiot you saw at the front of the line every (and I do mean every!) Saturday in the summer to see the original movie. Stayed for all 3 showings, too. Met my first girlfriend in line...and eventually convinced her to dress like Leia once in awhile (I know, I know, TMI). Saw that first movie (now considered the fourth) over 100 times that year, at $1.95 a pop.

So now, the kids and I hunker down on Friday nights to watch Clone Wars together. I call it Male Bonding...the wife calls us nuts. Especially when we have light saber duels during the commercials. The show is really good. Anthony Daniels remains the only actor to play the same character - C-3PO - in every incarnation of the franchise. Plus, Tom Kenny, the voice of Spongebob Squarepants (another Male Bonding experience in my house) voices a couple of characters.

All in all, not a bad way to spend a Friday evening with the kids. And after the young Padawans are in bed, I let the wife handle the light sabre (good grief - TMI again!)
Good times....good times.

teacher + day off = fun?

2008-10-09T18:26:00.000-07:00

Sadly, even algebra can't make that equation correct. I'm speaking of the Tuesday just past when I had to take a day off of work to care for my little one. During our latest heatwave, he spiked a fever of 103 at 2 in the a.m. and we just couldn't get him to cool off or calm down. So, being the trooper dad I am I volunteered to make the trek to the ER for some professional help (luckily, I'd already been asleep for 1.5 hours when he woke us up, so I had that going for me...)

5 hours later...I remember a time when ER actually stood for 'emergency room.' Not the "I know I'm not here in your country legally, and I won't be able to pay for this service, but I can't find a doctor to take care of my hangnail and it really, really hurts - not that you understand a word I'm saying anyway" room.

At least the doctors are nice. With four kids we've been to the ER plenty of times. They have great bedside manner, and are always ready to help you with your problem. When it's legitimate. But you sure can tell when they've had enough of the freeloaders that invade our medical system for free services and a quick 'scrip of something to take the edge off.

Today - he's just fine. The kid-drugs worked wonders and he's up and dancing around like nothing had ever happened. We were told that it was a good thing we brought him in when we did, as the fever hit 104 while were in the waiting room...that got us a quick "head of the line" pass after being there for 3 hours. Behind the hangnail lady.

One of the best things about the hospital? The coffee bar that opens at 5am. Jesus loves me, yes he does.

How to relieve that Monday Stress!!!!

2008-10-06T21:25:00.001-07:00

Ain't nothing in this world like singing in a choir. Me, I've been in some type of choral group since ninth grade. Jazz ensamble, professional quartet, barbershop harmony, madrigal singers...the list goes on and on. Last few years, I've been involved with a large (140 member) group at a local university. Half volunteers like me, half students working on music degrees. Every Monday, for three hours or so, we lift our voices in harmonious melodies that ring to the rafters. Close your eyes and take a deep breath. Hold it. Count to 7. Now, let it out slowly and keep your eyes closed. That relaxed feeling? Multiply it by 10 and you'll know how I feel during a rehearsal. Tonight we've been working on a Bach motet, "Singet dem Herren ein neues Lied," that gives me shivers, especially when the overtones ring in the upper octaves.
(motet: n. a religious song for a choir in which several voices, usually unaccompanied, sing contrasting parts simultaneously) (German translation: Sing to the Lord a new song.)
And when we basses get down to those low Es, Ds, and Cs, you can feel the risers rattle with the sound. A good thirty minutes of this and the stress just melts away. Three hours? I'm surprised I've not melted into a pile of goo.

Investment Opportunity!

2008-10-05T09:34:00.000-07:00

With the economy fluctuating like a sine wave on an oscilloscope, I was pleased to find this nugget of joy in my local coffee house (Intermezzo, in Hazard Center. Support your non-chain java joint!). Please to enjoy...

If you had bought 1,000 dollars worth of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00.
If you had bought 1,000 dollars worth of Enron stock, it would now be worth $16.50.
With Worldcom, you would have less than $5.00 left.

If you had bought 1,000 worth of Budweiser (the beer, not the stock) one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the 10-cent deposit, you would have $214.00.
The moral?
Drink heavily and recycle.

My kids are cooler than me

2008-10-02T20:42:00.000-07:00

I'm a very old school person. Ask anyone. I'd rather listen to classic rock, watch TV Land or Nick at Nite, and prefer Kirk to Picard.
But...someone please tell me how in the heck my 10 year old kid snagged an Ipod before I did!
Me? I'm still groovin to my CD player...and even the occasional cassette tape. But my #3 son gets an Ipod? Granted, he' s probably loaded it with Spongebob and Disney songs (unless the Sainted Wife has secretly added a Green Day song or two), and can only use one ear bud at a time.
But really...a 10y-o with an Ipod! Someone hand me my AARP card quick!

That Was the Week That Was

2008-09-28T12:12:00.000-07:00

Summertime was so nice. No driving kids hither and yon, no extra curricular activities to interrupt my after-work catnap, no schools sending home letters every other day asking to support this cause and that booster club. Now, with two in elementary and two in high school, the fall is shaping up to be one long day after another.
Monday choir practice
Tuesday Boy Scouts and the Improv group
Wednesday bowling, band practice, and religious ed.
Thursday after school study groups and play rehearsals
Friday karate practice
Good Lord where did my week go? Not to mention my gas.
And my money.

My feet are worn out...

2008-09-21T14:15:00.000-07:00

and I just can't bear to walk from the Teacups to New Orleans Square.

Let's hear it for The Mouse. The Disney execs, in their infinite wisdom, have declared 2009 as the Year of Celebration at their parks. Throughout 2009, you can get into Disneyland, Cal. Adventure, or Disney World FOR FREE on your birthday. That means our family can go six times next year. Two days in a row in September.
And we'll save enough to buy two churros and one frozen lemonade. Hurrah!

Vampires Suck

2008-09-21T09:45:00.000-07:00

...but in a good way.
Now that Sopranos is over, my Sunday nights have been taken over by the new HBO show "True Blood." Saw the preview info at this year's SD Comic-Con, and was interested enough to give it a try. When I found out the show was based on a series of Southern America Vampire Novels though, I almost passed it by. Were the vamps raised on blood and gumbo? Was Paula Dean going to stop in with her recipe for blood sausage? I figured it was going to end up being very romantic and not a guy show at all.

After the first two episodes, all I can say is Holy Shit! I'm hooked. Anna Paquin does a good turn as the prim and proper Sookie. Stephen Moyer is quite engaging as the lead vamp, Bill Compton. And Lois Smith as Sookie's grandma is just as cute as punch. Wait, this sounds too girly - where's the guy stuff in all this mush?

Sex. Rough, breast-bouncing, ass-slapping sex my friends. Humans with humans. Vampires with humans. Vampires with vampires. Chained to the ceiling bondage humping. Just look for the two little puncture wounds on the inner thighs of most of the women in the show and you'll know who's been biting whom. And where...

This show gets two fangs up.

my bad

2008-09-16T15:18:00.000-07:00

What the? Two posts down?
Well, thanks to a little scooter bird, I've been advised not to post 'sensitive' information about work on here. Just in case, donchaknow.

all night chicken

2008-09-14T12:54:00.000-07:00

Don't get me wrong. I'm a tolerant person. Live and let live - that's my motto. Unless you get on my bad side. Then I'd rather let you say hello to my little friend. And take your car.
Now, along with being tolerant, I'm also not a bigot. I understand that different cultures behave in different ways from mine. However...when their culture begins to infringe upon my basic rights as a homeowner, then they'd best be ready to have me come over and complain. Or send the cops.

The Hmong neighbors next door raise chickens. In the city limits. Against the law, so I've been told. And I've told the cops. And the cops have told them. Many times. Just doesn't seem to sink in. Apparently today is some big Hmong festival day. So last night (and I mean all last night and into this morning) there's been a chicken fry. Killing, plucking, chopping, quartering, marinating, frying. Over open flames. My living room, nay my entire house, smelled like the fire pit at Mission Bay after a few pallets had been set ablaze. My first trip to their fence at midnight to ask them to tone it down and douse the flame worked - for about an hour. Then, assuming I had met Mr. Sandman, they started up again, not realizing my Sainted Wife was still up.

My second trip to the fence at 2am had a bit more vitriol behind it, and they politely refrained. Until 7am this morning when their caravans of relatives pulled up, acquired every available on-street parking space, and fired up the pit in earnest. We've been neighbors for 10 years. Didn't even have the decency to send a few wings and thighs my way for our trouble.

Better go... I think I see the cops coming again...

giving up control

2008-09-10T22:46:00.000-07:00

I wonder if my parents felt like this when I got my driver's license?
Watching Number One Son take off down the street w/o me in the passenger seat as friend and confidant (more like nagging back seat driver) was one of the hardest things to do today. He passed his test yesterday, making only 6 errors during the drive - compared to the 12 I made waaayyyy back in 1976.
Now the only things I have to worry about are: higher insurance, buying more gas, snogging in the back seat, and the inevitable "Dad - I think I'm lost!"
Hide your daughters - Wild Red's kid is on the prowl!